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The devil came to see me,

the day I knew you'd gone.

He offered me the smallest deal,

to fix what had gone wrong.

He offered to take my feeling,

alter memory.

To take the pain I felt inside.

to free it as I bleed.

No memory of our first kiss,

no pain of our first touch.

No kindley smile of your sweet face,

ow the pleasure when we fucked.

I wayed it in against my soul,

to see it it was fair.

I found that I could live with pain,

Better knowing you and my dispair.

betrayal...bullshit and more betrayal...that is all that people are good for.

I am amazed at my own capacity for self loathing. I took my family's advice and put myself out there. I asked out 2 girls and both blew me off after a few hours around me. So there you have it, I am a total loss. Am I that repulsive? Am I that undesirable? Am I that big of a loser? I guess so...the worst part is I think they are right. Nobody can think less of myself, I am my own worst critic, and the truth is I will always be alone...I guess i am not that amazed.

I wake up in the morning,

to face reality.

Knowing that its my own face,

that I cant stand to see.

I'm taller the most others,

bigger then the rest.

Knowing that you cant stand me,

that this is still the best.

Can you even imagine,

understand just who I am.

Less then the dust upon the ground,

less then another man.

i have decided to delte my friends list and start over..so if anybody wants on..let me know asap, and then you will though actually be expected to talk to me